PATRON: Stephen Billington, actor
comedy
Comedy
A-Z by Title
A Good Boy
Danny Dice
M1/F0 (a woman could deliver the narrator's direct female speech)
Monologue, drama, comedy
School bores troublesome teenager Luke. He addresses Max, who’s regarded as ‘a good influence.’ Lockdown has enabled them to spend time together. Luke is a ‘harder to place’ child in foster care, awaiting his annual review.
Why is his foster carer, Rob the knob, behaving strangely?
“Important and original-unexpectedly moving” M6 Theatre judges, Love in the Time of Corona competition.
Adrian's Wall
Nick Wilkes
M6/F1
Full length, comedy drama
Adrian has worked in an office for a long time; the same desk, the same telephone, the same office window. Having just turned forty he’s decided that the time has come to change the view.
He sets out on an hilarious journey to walk the length of Hadrian’s Wall, and finds far more than just backpacks, blisters and bricks.
A school reunion, a few military ghosts, and a short eighty-four mile wander, what could possibly go wrong?
AIBU?
Danny Dice
M1/F2
Short, comedy drama
‘Why does something as simple as sex have to be so complicated?’ A mother posts on mumsnet.com. Is she being unreasonable rejecting her invisible* husband’s endless sexual advances? Should she leave him?
Two posters with opposing views give contradictory advice.
*Timesaver! Skip this if you’re not comfortable with invisible characters. Or dishwashers.
Believe
Baz Stilinski
M6/F8
(Please note some characters can change gender as required. Jamie is a young role. Ensemble is also required which can include some of the characters. Some characters expected to sing)
Full length, comedy
Two life-long friends are reunited. One is an angel on a mission to try & save the other. The other is an atheist & doesn’t know his friend has died.
Can a group of angels get someone to believe before it is too late or will the past prove to be the biggest barrier?
Body of Knowledge
Craig B. Holland
M1/F1
Short, dark comedy
A dull day in the morgue is interrupted when an Aussie mortuary worker tries to remove a body without the proper paperwork.
Care Free
Steve Dimmer
2F/1M
One act/black comedy
Peggy & Pat have been partners for many years. Peggy's decline in health, both physical and mental, means she's had to enter a care home.
Late one morning Pat visits her and experiences Peggy's fluctuation in mental health until her tolerance reaches breaking point.
The play examines the relationship between the two women, exploring themes of love, loyalty and the situations the elderly have to endure as they reach the end of their life.
Casting
Nick Wilkes
M3/F1
Full length, comedy
Julius is an award-winning gritty Director. Raymond is an independently wealthy posh Producer. Their much-anticipated production of Hamlet is about to premiere but their Hamlet and Ophelia have run off together.
They have until 6pm to overcome this problem or the money gets pulled. Such is the state of arts funding, such are the problems of casting!
Christopher Marlowe's Henry
James Lewis Huss
M7/F5 (+2-4 non speaking men)
Full length, comedy (Mock Tragedy)
This is a mock Renaissance tragedy based on the life of Henry Fitzroy, bastard son of King Henry VIII and one-time contender for the crown of England.
Henry was married at 15, died at 17, and NEVER consummated his marriage. A greater tragedy has yet to be written.
This is not just a comedy about sex and erectile dysfunction written in blank verse, it is a story of a love that grows out of friendship.
Cram
David Lydon
M3(1 boy)/F2
Full length, drama, black comedy
What is the true price of education?
Alec finds it just enough to live on, whilst his student Michael finds it an unwelcome distraction from his own imagination. Sally and Marcus are counting the cost of self-improvement whilst scouring the wreckage of previous dalliances, and Julia is trying to make sense of the logic of paying for education when you can get a perfectly good one for nothing.
Curtain Call
David Lydon
M8/F4 (1 vo)
Full length, comedy
It's the first night for Sir Andrew Samson's new play. The preview was a disaster, with the harshest critic in town giving it a terrible review.
In the audience are Michael & Fiona, a young couple. They are sitting next to another young couple, Lawrence & Charlotte, both of whom Michael hates & there's every chance the harshest critic in town might well be in the crowd.
What ensues is a very interesting first night...
Disconnected
Nick Wilkes
M3/F2
Full length, comedy
Norman is an island. Actually, Norman is a telecoms engineer and has been sent to the small island of St Peters to disconnect the old red telephone box, which is no longer commercially viable. The residents are not happy about it.
With a boat to catch and a job sheet to complete, will time and tide wait for Norman? Or like the island will he end up disconnected?
Flood
Vanessa Lee
2 actors - either gender
One Act, comedy, dark comedy, fable/folktale, radio drama, science fiction
The world has become submerged under water.
Icarus, with the help of his loyal sidekick Meander, is searching for their only remaining link to the humans of old: a box containing a priceless treasure.
Funny Faces 1: Heavenly Margaret
Steve Dimmer
F1
One act monologue, comedy drama
Sitting in limbo before entering the pearly gates, Margaret Rutherford, one of the most beloved actresses of all time, reflects on her life, her relationships with some of the giants of theatre & her career.
Funny & poignant, secrets about Dame Margaret's life will surprise her admirers.
This kinetic play is a true challenge
for any company. Combined with any other play in the FUNNY FACES
series, it makes for a great evening of theatre.
Funny Faces 2: Wot Sid Did
Steve Dimmer
M1
One act monologue, comedy drama
Holed up in his dressing room just before what will be his final performance, lovable rogue Sid James reflects on his life, his career, his affairs and his many addictions, all the while avoiding the painful memories of the lost love of his life, Barbara Windsor.
You will laugh, think & sympathise for this great flawed talent who is remembered for simply making us all laugh.
This kinetic play is a true challenge for any company.
Funny Faces 3: SIMply JOAN
Steve Dimmer
F1
One act monologue, comedy drama
Joan Sims was considered a happy actress, yet her life was one of highs & lows as she sought love & a face to meet her growing fame.
The show explores her career, her friendships with Kenneth Williams & other Carry On legends, her relationship with her parents & failed romances.
This kinetic play is a true challenge
for any company. Combined with any other play in the FUNNY FACES
series, it makes for a great evening of theatre.
Funny Faces 4: Goodnight Irene
Steve Dimmer
F1
One act monologue, comedy drama
Looking back on her life, Irene Handl's acting career did not begin until her 40s & her successful life as a novelist began when she was 64.
Irene worked with all of the great actors of the day, including Sellers & Coward.
Irene's constant optimism ripples through this play about the much admired yet private actress.
Combined with any other play in the FUNNY FACES series, it makes for a great evening of theatre.
Funny Faces 5: Conking Out
Steve Dimmer
M1
One act monologue, comedy drama
Actor, John Le Mesurier, reminisces about his life, his work, his love (and loss) of Hattie Jacques & his decency when his third wife began an affair with best friend Tony Hancock.
Tinged with humour, wit & warmth, this gentle man has a life story that is as fascinating as it is unique.
This kinetic play is a true challenge
for any company. Combined with any other play in the FUNNY FACES
series, it makes for a great evening of theatre.
Funny Faces 6: Going Through the Mill Again
Steve Dimmer
M1
One act monologue, comedy drama
Set on a psychiatric ward, this is a play about the genius of comedy, Spike Milligan, as he reflects on his achievements & the price he paid for them.
Packed with humour & melancholy, Spike's journey to stardom is full of jokes, depression & language that reflects his army background.
This kinetic play is a true challenge for any company. Combined with any other play is the FUNNY FACES series, it makes for a great evening of theatre.
Good for the Soul
Roger Lee
M2/F1
Short (approx. 10 minutes), comedy
Steph is a feisty young woman not to be taken on lightly. However, even she knows she’ll be in trouble for killing her boyfriend, Bim.
Befuddled but defiant she decides to make her confession, something she hasn’t done for a while…
‘Genuinely funny’ Suzanna Cardash, Scriptwriters & Co
The Undisposables Scratch Night, Ye Olde Rose and Crown Theatre, Walthamstow
Pint Sized Plays Long List
He, Haditcummin
Jo Smith
M6/F3
Full length, comedy/parody
Lord & Lady Ownalott are hosting their annual soiree, one dark and stormy night, inviting neighbours, Mr & Mrs Fortune, and the local clergyman, Reverend Churcher, for dinner. However, the guests get more than they bargained for when one of them ends up dead...
A hilarious, light-hearted, fast-paced stage play which gently pokes fun at the classic "whodunnit" format.
Hey L'il Man
Baz Stilinski
M5/F10
(Please note that there are small ensemble parts needed which can be doubled up 2 male and 2 male are young characters. Some characters expected to sing)
Full length, drama comedy
A journey of family life told through the eyes of a stranger who becomes involved when tragedy strikes. Join two families who experience life’s twist and turns, laughter and tears, happiness and sadness.
Even in life’s greatest tragedy, can a miracle still be found?
Hofstadter's Law
Danny Dice
M2/F0 (could be M3/F1)
Short, comedy drama
26.2 miles in under 26.2 minutes! Danny is convinced that running his first marathon with best friend B will enable him to write his first novel.
Why do two unexpected fellow competitors so unsettle Danny? Can Danny learn something from ex-world record holder Dr Ron Hill MBE? Why is B furtive about his wife’s texts? Will Danny and B’s friendship survive?
Hooley
Peter Cowlam
M8/F8/4 extras
Full length, comedy
Hooley runs a psychotherapy practice (unsuccessfully, as she remains only one step ahead of creditors). Her personal life fares little better, having bought a vicarage occupied by squatters who are impossible to evict.
Meanwhile Pollock, a client of Hooley’s, believes Hopkins, a religious fanatic, is about to commit murder, while Hopkins thinks the universe is caught between good & evil resulting in a life & death battle.
iBard
Nick Wilkes
M4
Full length, comedy
Andrew was an English teacher. He now cleans toilets. He has a wife, a child, half a cat, and isn’t quite making ends meet.
He’s decided that if Shakespeare was indeed ‘for all time’, then he must belong in the twenty-first century too. So Andrew is off to London to seek his fortune by bringing Will Shakespeare into the digital age. Is he Fortune’s fool, or is there method in his madness? That is the question.
Imagine
Baz Stilinski
M3/F2
(A voiceover of a news reporter is also required)
One act, comedy
(Please note that this play has also been adapted to be a pilot episode for television and has an alternative ending)
A family are trying to come to terms with isolation during the lockdown but with two teenage boys in the house, this is going to be a struggle for anyone.
Jitters
Nick Wilkes
M5/F2
Full length, comedy
Saying ‘I do’ is easy, but finding that special someone to say ‘Will you?’ is an entirely different proposal. It’s a big step, especially when it’s the second time around and the first ended in disaster.
A groom with a past, a best man losing his best mate, and a father of the bride with just a little too much pride. It’s fair to say they all have jitters.
LOL
Craig B. Holland
3 actors (any gender) and 2 actors to carry off a body
Short, dark comedy/absurd comedy
Two young people with smartphones encounter a crisis and struggle to do the right thing.
Love in a Crocodile
Craig B. Holland
M6/F7 (or M3/F4 w/doubling)
Full length, comedy, romance
Down-and-out and living in a homeless camp, Cyrus and Phoebe wager over whether or not true love exists in the world.
They position themselves near a garden cafe and overhear the conversations of several couples in various stages of their relationships.
They search for clues behind the nerd date, the blind date, the first date, the gamophobe, and all those distractions that get in the way of love.
Mr Wong's Wonderful Winged Delivery Service
Vanessa Lee
M2/F3
One act, comedy, radio drama
When the post office branch of his shop closes down, Simon Wong decides to open a bird-post service.
But things don't all go according to
plan...
Nay, Remember Me!
Amelia Mariette
M15/F7 (Min without doubling 22, 13 with)
Full length, comedy drama
A fast paced comedy about the printing of the first complete works of Shakespeare – The First Folio of 1623.
In the play, Shakespeare appears as a ghost; actors become editors & a wayward apprentice turns order into chaos.
The play also propels the story forward to Washington DC in the 19th Century to unravel the story of the greatest collector of First Folios – Henry Clay Folger of the Folger Library.
Shakespeare's Robin V
James Lewis Huss
M18 speaking (7 non-speaking, can be paired with other roles)/F2
Full length, comedy
Shakespeare’s Robin V is a mock Shakespearean tragedy based on the legends of Robin Hood & the history of Richard the Lionheart.
A comedy in five acts, we follow Robin of Loxley as he struggles to convince his merry band of men to use their stolen wealth to save his true love, King Richard, from captivity in Germany before the dummy-prince John usurps the throne of England.
Stage Door Blues
Marc Harris
M2/F1
Short, comedy
Liz is determined to wait until she has her theatre programme signed. Robert is impatient, and persists in undermining her and Russ, an actor, because of her infatuation with him.
Can they overcome their differences and bickering, and is Liz able to hold on to her secret?
A fun script with a plot twist half way through.
Running time: Approximately 17 minutes.
In 2019, this reached the short list of Pintsized Plays.
The Get Out
Nick Wilkes
M8/F5
Full length, comedy
The curtain has fallen, the performance has concluded and the audience are on their way home. For some however, the evening has only just begun...
Props to pack away, furniture to move, scenery to take down, lights to lower, ropes to haul, a lorry to pack, a romance to conclude, and no accidents please...!
A technical comedy about keeping the show on the road.
The Heist
Jo Smith
M6/F3
Full length, comedy
Bored of life and tired of being down on his luck, Eddie Smith gathers his not-so-merry men for one last heist.
If tempers aren’t frayed enough as the has-beens dust off their stocking masks and plan the raid of a lifetime, a surprise appearance from a skeleton in the cupboard threatens to throw a spanner in the works.
This Is Where We Get Off
Ingram Noble & Heather Spiden
M2/F4
Full length, comedy drama
“Welcome to Bricklethwaite. Located in the heart of the North of England, this bustling town is the perfect place to explore with over six hundred years of history, beautiful scenery and famous attractions."
This Is Where We Get Off follows the lives of an ordinary family dealing with the return of a sick relative. How long will it be until cracks start to show in this family unit?
Three Feet
Nick Wilkes
M3/F1
Full length, comedy
Albert works the night shift, a porter at an Isle of Man hotel. Comfortable by himself and content in his work he deals with the guest’s night-time requests.
So when two new staff are assigned to his shift he finds that more than his space is invaded. He might cope with the wisecracks of a Liverpudlian lad, but what will he do with a woman!
Is more than two company, is less than three a crowd, and will Albert ever stand on his own three feet?
To Build a Wooden O
Nick Wilkes
M9/F3
Full length, comedy drama
It’s 1598 & Will Shakespeare needs a new theatre.
He & his company are stuck at the ageing Curtain Theatre in the wrong part of town, whilst south of the river business is booming & theatres are packing in pounds & pennies a plenty.
Against this backdrop an audacious plan is hatched with the highest of stakes, life or death, all whilst Will is writing a new little history piece called Henry V.
Wasters
Nick Wilkes
M3/F1
Full length, comedy drama
Peter lives in an alley at the back of the supermarket. Has done for years. He knows that at six o’clock every day the food arrives. Food that is past it’s sell-by date, which the supermarket throws out.
Mostly warm and mostly dry, his existence is one of cardboard, coffee and chatting to his friend, the bin. He is king of his road…
… and then David arrives.
Who's Afraid of the Brooker Prize?
Peter Cowlam
M4/F3/3 extras
Full length, comedy/satire
Marshall Zob, a well-known novelist’s main frustration is that, although frequently shortlisted for the Booker Prize, he's never actually won it.
His latest novel is longlisted but he & his agent, Cornelius Snell, fear that Zob won’t win without clever publicity scheme. The best that Snell comes up with is a reading at the South Bank complex.
However, Snell has hatched a plan to maximise coverage of Zob's reading: a public riot.
Wolf Like Me
David Lydon
M2/F3
Full length, drama, black comedy, modern tragedy, music
Punk legend, Robin O is on the cusp of being relevant again – she's finally clean enough to tour, her fans are returning after years of neglect, & there is the promise of new material on the horizon. Yet she seems determined to see this long-overdue revival go down in flames.
Faced with the prospect of a reunion with her former band mate, her love of music is enough to conquer any personal demons. Surely?
You Bet
Pete Harrison
M6/F1
One act, comedy
Based on a true story, the customers and staff of a 1970's betting shop devise and carry out a betting 'coup' that nets one of them a small fortune.